Monday, May 22, 2006

RCMP Uses Intimidating Wheels - CanWest Exclusive

Appearing directly below a banner add for the new Pontiac Montana SV6, one of CanWest’s typists hammered out a childish little rant about the RCMP using a General Motors SUV in the Prime Ministers motorcade, or in CanWest speak; ‘parade’. For your amusement I’ve added some missing text.

CanWest Petty News Service; Ottawa Citizen
Tim Naumetz, (with additional material by Italics Mine)
Published: Monday, May 22, 2006

OTTAWA – (I think) Prime Minister Stephen Harper's motorcade has acquired a presidential look and (one of my very liberal friends) thinks the big black SUV now 'cruising' at the rear of the entourage is a bit too remindful (?) of President George W. Bush.

And (hopefully) its gas-chugging (?) potential raises other issues (we can attack him with), even for a prime minister who ditched the Kyoto accord, says New Democrat Pat Martin.

(Does the CanWest/NDP continuum think the RCMP should be following the Prime Minister in a Prius? I sense an M. Asper op-ed piece.)

(metaphor alert)
The SUV ‘surfaced’ two weeks ago behind the 'armoured' limousine, and a lead car, that 'ferries' Harper about town. The motorcade takes Harper even (sic) from his Langevin Building office across Wellington Street to his Centre Block space on Parliament Hill.

The drivers are 'armed' RCMP officers, but the addition of the SUV makes the entire motorcade look like a Secret Service (they're American) operation (to me).

Bush has had black SUVs in his motorcade for several years (connect the dots people, Harper=Bush).

The 320-horsepower (that's too much) V8 (4 will do) Chevrolet Tahoe now ‘embedded’ (like those turncoat reporters) in Harper's parade is made in the U.S. (he’s out-sourcing Canadian jobs) GM Canada truck plants assemble Silverado pickups.

As has been said (by me in a pub) of the SUVs in Bush's 'procession', the new black wheels add an ‘air of intimidation’ to Harper's motorcade.


Chevy Tahoe without 'Air of Intimidation' package. Posted by Picasa

"It looks like something Darth Vader would be driving," says (Utopian fantasist) Martin. "We've got this gas-guzzling behemoth (The Centenial Flame ?) touring around with the prime minister (destroying the ozone, depleting natural resources and frightening the children. Doesn’t anyone care about the children except Ken Dryden?). It looks tough (to me), it looks quasi-military (to me). Is that the kind of image the prime minister wants to project (to me)?"

(When you look at something and see something else it’s called ‘projecting’. I do it all the time, when I look at the Ottawa Citizen I see bird cage liner.)

Officials at the Defence Department (?) and Emergency Preparedness Canada (?) could not say whether security levels have changed because of Canada's decision to engage an army battle group against the Taliban in Afghanistan (connect the dots people; the war; Bush's war, military vehicles in the streets, Hitler, duh!!!).

Do you believe this drivel? This is what passes for news in Canada. Ya' think CanWest wish the Liberals were still in power? Me too.

I want to get some of those 'intimidating' wheels for my Buick, then go spin donuts in the Ottawa Citizen Parking lot. Ye-haw.

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